


The Boy You Lost to Heroin

by SailorLestrade



Series: 50 Fic Challenge [21]
Category: Mötley Crüe, The Dirt (2019)
Genre: 50 fic challenge, Drug Addiction, Drugs, Fighting, Heartbreak, Heroin, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-29 03:55:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19822021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SailorLestrade/pseuds/SailorLestrade
Summary: It’s been 15 days since Tommy left Nikki.





	The Boy You Lost to Heroin

**Author's Note:**

> #43 If I don’t do this now, you’re going to die

Nikki and Tommy had been apart for two weeks now. Tommy had walked out on Nikki after the millionth time of him choosing heroin over him. It had been two, miserable weeks and Nikki was spiraling fast. He wasn’t the boy that Tommy had fallen in love with all those years ago. He was something dark and scary, something cold. He wasn’t Nikki anymore.

Tommy sat on his couch, staring at the wall. The first couple nights, Nikki had called repeatedly, trying to get Tommy to come back. He came by a few times and tried to get in the house, but in his state, he couldn’t get the key in the lock and just gave up. It was day fifteen and the drummer hadn’t heard a single noise from the bassist.

And it let his mind think back on the old days.

****

“You know I love you, right?”

Nikki had told him that back in late ‘82, after a night of partying. Tommy had been sprawled out on Nikki’s bed, about half asleep. He was sure Nikki thought he was all the way asleep when he muttered those words. When Tommy opened his eyes and looked up at him, he could see the fear in Nikki’s eyes.

“You know I love you too, right?” Was Tommy’s answer.

Things had been up and down since then. When Shout at the Devil got big, the two spent a week in a Vegas hotel, where they screwed, drank, gambled, and did all sorts of deliciously sinful things.

“You know, we could get a quickie wedding and no one would even know,” Nikki had told him on day four of their trip.

“I don’t think even a Vegas chapel will marry two dudes yet,” Tommy had laughed. Nikki smiled and kissed Tommy deeply.

“It’s okay, you’re already Mrs. Sixx to me,” He teased him.

That was before everything went to shit. Before Nikki started into deeper drugs besides cocaine and pot. When one bottle of Jack wasn’t enough for Vince, and Vodka was like water to Mick. When Tommy was just trying to do as much as Nikki was to keep up with him, but Nikki developed a new love, one that didn’t involve Tommy.

Nikki went someplace Tommy couldn’t follow. A dark place filled with needles and smack. It was like he was having an affair. He’d sneak around, having hushed phone calls with his dealers, miss out on dates and practices. Tommy needed Nikki after Razzle’s death. He had been close to the other drummer and Nikki was too busy with his other love to even offer any support.

It all came to a head two weeks ago. Tommy had been at Nikki’s, but honestly, it should’ve just been Tommy’s second house. They had been talking about moving in together before Nikki started shooting up all the time. But now Tommy was at Nikki’s house more than Nikki was. Tommy was sitting on the couch, listening to some records when Nikki came in, fresh drugs in his system and an 8 ball in his pocket.

“Tommy,” Nikki said, freezing in the doorway. “What are you doing here?”

“You gave me a key when you bought the place,” Tommy told him. “I hadn’t heard from you in a few days. Thought you might be lying dead on the floor.”

“Oh, I’m good, so…” Nikki stood there awkwardly in the door.

“Who are they?” Tommy asked. Nikki frowned.

“Who is who?” He asked, genuinely confused.

“Who are you seeing?” Tommy asked, standing up to full height. He was only an inch taller than Nikki, but he wanted to use his height to an advantage. A way so that Nikki couldn’t see just how upset he was.

“You?” Nikki raised an eyebrow.

“Really? Because when was the last time you saw me before today?” Tommy asked, crossing his arms over his chest. Nikki frowned, but his clouded mind could not figure out the last time he had seen the man he loved. Nikki’s silence was enough of an answer for Tommy. “Well, that’s just great.”

“I’m not cheating on you, if that’s what you’re getting at,” Nikki snapped.

“When we’re actually together, you have to keep excusing yourself. When we went out for dinner last time, you went to the bathroom at least seven times. You are making hushed phone calls and if I’m over and the phone rings, you all but run to answer it before I get a chance to,” Tommy stared Nikki down. “You don’t want to have sex anymore. At first I thought it was just the stress of everything. But then things cooled down with recording and you still don’t want to. You don’t even want me staying over anymore. If you’re done with me, just tell me!”

“I’m not done with you, I love you.” Nikki all but hissed. Tommy shook his head and looked away. That’s when something caught his eye. Something he had missed while he was sitting there waiting for Nikki. Nikki’s eyes seemed to follow to where Tommy was looking.

“Tommy don’t!” Nikki called out, but Tommy didn’t listen. He grabbed the edge of the baggie that was sticking up from under a chair cushion. Inside was the leftover powder and a couple of needles. Tommy turned to look at Nikki.

“What is this?” He asked. Nikki just stayed silent. “Nikki, what the fuck are you taking?”

“Shut up!” Nikki growled. “It’s none of your damn business.”

“It is my business when it’s ruining the band and us!” Tommy yelled at Nikki.

“I have everything under control!” Nikki told him.

“No you don’t!” Tommy shook his head. “Do you even know what day it is?”

“It’s Tuesday,” Nikki told him, smug, until he saw Tommy’s hurt eyes.

“It’s Friday,” Tommy told him. “Tuesday was the date you stood me up for.”

“Oh…” Nikki cleared his throat. Tommy bit his lip as the tears welled up in his eyes.

“What is it going to take for you to stop?” Tommy asked.

“Nothing,” Nikki told him. “I don’t have a problem. I have it all under control.”

“Then I can’t stay,” Tommy told him. “If to do this now, you’re going to die.”

“What?” Nikki didn’t like where this was going.

“It’s either me, or the drugs,” Tommy told him. “Which one are you choosing?” Nikki stayed silent for the second time in this conversation, and it told Tommy everything he needed to know. He nodded his head. “Okay,” He picked up his bike keys. “See you around Sixx.”

“Where the fuck are you going?” Nikki asked, watching him head to the door. Tommy stopped and turned to look at him.

“I’m not going to stand here and watch you destroy yourself,” Tommy told him before he walked out the door.

*****

That had been fifteen days ago and Tommy hadn’t heard from Nikki. Until tonight. When the TV told him that Nikki was dead and it felt like he had been stabbed repeatedly in his heart. He had all but cried himself out when his phone rang. He didn’t want to answer it, but something told him to.

“Hello?” Tommy asked, unsure of his own voice. Things were quiet for a second and Tommy almost hung up when he heard a soft, familiar voice on the other end.

“Babe? I’m not dead.”


End file.
